“Running To Jesus” watercolor by Ann Jackson
One evening following an exhaustive day at work, while driving to a church staff meeting, I thought of a friend in her 40s who, several days before, had met Jesus at an evangelistic meeting. For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16 (KJV). She was ecstatically joyful as, upon surrendering her life to Jesus, he delivered her from a life of despicable circumstances. I questioned Jesus, “Why is it that after years of serving you, many seasoned Christians seem to have lost the joy of their salvation? Would you restore to me that joy, Jesus?” Restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation and uphold me with Thy free spirit. Psalms 51:12, (KJV).
I soon learned that if you expect God to answer a passionate question immediately, asking it while driving is not good. I found a place to pull off the freeway as God’s presence gripped me. While leaning back in the driver’s seat, my eyes closed, Jesus took me back to the moment of my salvation. As a child I attended a spiritual growth meeting with my family at a little Mennonite church. When the speaker invited those who wanted assurance that they were loved, safe, and cleansed from sin to receive Jesus, that you-know-when-you-know moment, a weak feeling of conviction inundated me. At age 6, with a smile that filled the room, I ran down the aisle (strictly forbidden in a “sanctified” congregation, I might add), my pigtails waving in the breeze and feeling a surge of joy in my heart as I said yes to Jesus. My salvation didn’t guarantee life would be peaches and cream from that point on, but knowing Jesus I had joy in my heart that nothing could steal. As I continued to savor the renewal of my salvation experience, in my mind’s eye as I turned to leave the church now as an adult decades later, I envisioned a mountainous road with several sharp curves. I asked Jesus what those curves represented. Guilt overcame me as I recognized the curves represented several bad choices I had made where I almost slipped and fell over the edge. I was repentant then, remembering those times that dishonored Jesus. I asked forgiveness for the heavy baggage that had burdened me for many years during the weak moments on my Christian journey, defined as sin. I was reminded of God’s assurance, “For I hold you by your right hand— I, the LORD your God. And I say to you, ‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you.” (Isaiah 41:13, NLT). He will not let your foot be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber. Psalm 121:3, (KJV)
After this moment with Jesus and back on the freeway again, I proceeded to the meeting with restored joy. But Jesus had more for me. Sometimes, when we ask him simple questions, even though we get a satisfying response, he uses that moment of receptive tenderness to teach us a more profound truth. The staff meeting began quietly with worship music softly playing as we listened for God’s leading. And not knowing what had only minutes ago happened between Jesus and me, our pastor’s wife, who had only known me for a few weeks, put her hand on me and said, “This doesn’t make any sense to me, Joyce, but I felt Jesus say to reassure you that He has forgiven your rebellion, not just as a child but the weight you’ve been carrying through your adult years for those times you slipped and almost fell. Receive His joy.”
The rest of the staff meeting happened without me because the Holy Spirit chose for several hours to help me process God’s profound forgiveness and the fullness of his joy in a still and quiet place reserved for that day in my life. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my father’s commands and remain in his love.I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. John 15:10-11 (NIV)
At any point in our walk where there might be unconfessed sin, we may experience the loss of the joy of knowing Jesus. But if we want a fresh touch from the Holy Spirit to thrust us into a more profound, genuine joy, we can invite him to restore the joy we experienced during our conversion. As years progress, confusing man-made rules and regulations mar the simplicity of childlike faith and joy. I felt encouraged that my restored joy was to be evident and always on display for God’s glory within the scope of ministry. And that with renewed faith and joy, I was even to risk being giddy for God at times exposing God’s light side to bless and refresh those I led, by communicating from a heart unencumbered by “just the right words.”
God desires that we ask him what’s on our hearts. This experience left me wondering how much less confusing life could have been if I had asked God more often. But I rest assuredly in the knowledge that there is even more abundant joy ahead as I share my questions and concerns with him. And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for. 1 John 5:14-15( NLT). I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13 (NLT
Joyce Olsen (Sonrise Magazine Editor) Author. Majored in Child Psychology and Elementary Education at Biola University and Fresno State University in California. However, her natural bent seemed to better match business and administration. In those fields, she worked in corporate administration, church administration, and also as an Information Security Analyst in the medical field. The focus of her writing is to inspire and provoke thought.
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